How is your day going all? It's pretty quite around here. Kids cut up 5 reams of paper into "helicopters" and then scattered the pieces all over the kitchen, living room and dining room. At least we now have confetti....EVERYWHERE! Yeah!
We've had a few lessons in listening to mom as well. [thunk] WHAAAAAA!!!!! "What happened?" "T just fell off the couch." "What was she doing that she fell off the couch?" "She was standing on it cause we were going to jump in the water." They like to pretend the floor is the ocean. "Maybe she shouldn't be standing on the couch huh?" Don't listen to the mom! She has no idea what she's talking about 90% of the time anyway. She's never fell off of a couch (drunk or sober). She's never jumped from the top of the stairs and landed on her ass at the bottom! (another interesting feat we've accomplished today) She's never slid off the arm of the recliner taking out a kidney on the corner of the end table! What the hell does she know?! She's just the dumb mom!
One day....One day when they're my age and listening to their own kids trying to murder themselves on the furniture, then they'll realize, maybe that blabbing, annoying biotch was right! Maybe....one day....just maybe....but not for a looooong time from now. In the mean time....."Come here little lady. Let's put some ice on your bleeding lip. Daddy's going to be so impressed when he gets home from work. So impressed that maybe he'll be inclined to stay at home and I'll go back to work full time." BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
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